March 21, 2017
Mar 6

Mar 6

Yesterday was my husband’s birthday. The boys were very keen to make Daddy’s day great – he got to sleep in and have breakfast in bed (cornflakes and coffee), homemade cards (Thank you whoever invented mess-less glitter!!), supper that he (mostly) didn’t make, and of course cake! 

Arthur insisted on sewing a fabric ball as a gift, and with a (very) little help it worked out great. Though mostly he and Edward played with it. But at 8 and 4 it’s the initial thought that counts, right??  

I ordered some patterns for making my own clothes. I have been hoarding fabric for ages and now it’s time to start making things with it. Truly. It’s going to happen.

I started participating in a March Drawing-a-day group. Art practice? I don’t know. I don’t intend any of the drawings to ‘turn into’ anything. They aren’t prep or prelim work. They are isolated scribblings, mostly in an attempt to have a brief window of discipline. Externally imposed by the fact that I signed up and committed to it.

I’m two days behind.

Last week I met with a realtor to ask about the types of renos and improvements that would be needed to sell our house – we rented and then bought it, so it most things haven’t been updated since it was built in 1993.  It’s added a whole new level of ‘should do’s’ to our already crippling list.

Edward’s being bullied at his dayhome. As a parent it is such a sucky situation, and so hard to know what to do. We don’t want to be helicopter parents – but he is tiny. And the other kid is known to be sneaky, violent, and mean. He waits until the teacher’s back is turned, destroys whatever Ned’s working on, and is basically gone by the time she can turn around. Last week, Ned finally snapped and bit him. I feel awful, he shouldn’t bite…but I can’t blame him.  If it were me, I’m pretty sure I’d retaliate too. So how do I consequence that??

Mar 10

So I’ve been doing the drawing a day for ten days, I caught up! I’m surprisingly pleased with a few of them. When I did the challenge last year I didn’t take it too seriously, and I got a nasty virus right in the middle, so I really wasn’t too happy with my work. This year I decided to put more effort into it. Having a few already that I feel good about is encouraging. Like I said before I really didn’t expect these sketches to produce anything so I’m going to say ‘yeah me!’

I’m feeling like my posts are very banal – seeing George conquer mountains, Maria corral a homestead, Joyce’s experiments brewing, it’s bring home my feelings of dissatisfaction and stagnation.  I love my day job, but working halftime is brutal. I love teaching but there aren’t that many classes. I look at the things needed to “set myself up” as an artist and feel totally overwhelmed. I don’t have (minimum) $2000 to get a designer to set up a website. I don’t have time (or desire) to learn to create one myself – templates, hosting, domains are just not my thing. I feel Ramla, Wayne, Rob and I are in much the same boat – sad, discouraged, drifting.

Mar 14 (aka: 3.14)

Pi Day!

Not sure I’ll actually get to eat pie today but it tickles my funny bone every year.

We made noodles with the boys on Sunday. They were super stoked to be getting all goopy in the kitchen. It pushes my control freak buttons but ended up being super fun. We’ll have to do that again soon. 

I went from being caught up on my drawings to 3 days behind. I’m struggling with how I want to interpret some of the themes: Taxi, Gone with the Wind and Lawrence of Arabia (the coordinator declared it movie week). Maybe I’ll ditch those and just doodle something random.

In one of my adult classes the students wanted to know what I’m teaching next semester, so they could sign up. That’s a pretty huge compliment, in my mind.    

It went from -19 to +10 between Sunday and today (Tuesday). My head is killing me. Chinook headaches are no joke.

My poor boys are really struggling with the time change, losing an hour of sleep has left them deeply unhappy about waking to go to school and daycare in the mornings. Even Peanut who is normally a cheerful morning person and not very cuddly came in and tucked himself into bed with us this morning.

I’m starting to think some of the difficulty with understanding him is because his nose is always stuffy. But… how do you get a 4-year-old to cooperate with nasal irrigation? Something to ponder.

I got home from teaching last night and started poking around on Pinterest before going to bed. I looked up my Myers-Briggs personality profile (INTJ). Very funny and spot on quotes and infographics.

Mar 15

My clothes patterns came! Now to find time to work on them…

Mar 20

Happy vernal equinox!

I used my studio night Friday to pin and cut pattern pieces for one shirt. I’m hoping to find time this week to actually sew it. It’s a summer shirt in hopes of speeding along the weather. J It’s still cold here -8 and everyone is done with it. The weekend was so very busy, kids’ classes and teaching, playdates and birthday parties. It pulls time away from things like housecleaning but I’m cool with that. It’s so fun to see the boys excited and interacting with others.  It amazes me to see the difference in their personalities – at home they are whirlwinds, talking and moving constantly, so outgoing and LOUD but when they get out in the world they seem very quiet and reserved and with waaaaay better manners!

It’s getting to the end of my hiatus and I haven’t made myself sit down and do too much serious thinking about what comes next. I pulled my copy of the Artist’s Way and it’s sitting on my table watching me, waiting… I’m definitely feeling so much better without the pressure I was heaping on myself and without the pressure the art I’ve been doing is so satisfying and makes me feel more like ‘me’. So, obviously, I can’t not create. But do I have it in me to be creating and not want to/feel obliged to be writing grants and exhibition proposals? Three and a half years later I’m finally getting over my volunteer burnout and thinking of starting to be back out in the community doing things but with the wisdom NOT to take on a massive project.

For now sketches.

I’m seven days behind.

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